Losing Lucy

This post might be confusing - sorry - there is a lot swirling around in my mind.

I didn’t realize that I was a little depressed until a few weeks ago, when I suddenly had some episodes of actual happiness. I had not felt that for a while, and it was pretty fleeting, so it made me realize that I really do have some low-grade depression.

Before I go on, I am not clinically depressed in a serious way. I was a long time ago, so I know what that’s like. If you are clinically depressed - very depressed for over a few weeks - then please see a doctor immediately! Depression is not something to fool around with. It can be fatal (suicide).

Right now, though, I am just mildly depressed. Those happy episodes have stopped too.

I was trying to figure out what caused the happy spells, and I think it had something to do with the changes I had made in my eating - either going off of Lean Cuisines, trying to eat healthier, eating protein with each meal, or stopping Aspartame (Nutra-Sweet - in many sodas, etc.). In the meantime, life has been hectic, I am not sleeping enough again, I am drinking sodas with Aspartame, etc.

Anyway, today, I happened across a site that mentioned 5-HTP as a more “natural” cure for depression. It is supposed to increase your serontonin levels. Other (probably better) ways of increasing serontonin are exercise or eating certain foods. But the depression is dragging me down so much now (I just realized that winter could be part of it - not enough daylight) - that I think I might need a little help.

So on the way home I stopped at Wal-Mart (yes I hate it too), and picked up some 5-HTP, 50mg, capsules. That was the only strength they had; one site recommended starting at 25 mg and working up, but I guess 50 is ok, some people take a lot more. (Disclaimer: As it says in the footer, I am not a doctor, talk to your doctor before taking anything.) Don’t take 5-HTP if you are on antidepressants. I read that the interactions can be really dangerous.

I took one with dinner - I guess I’ll see what happens. I am not usually a fan of taking a lot of medications, but this is supposed to be more natural, and I really could use a boost. Depression is the pits. I read that 5-HTP could keep you awake - hope that doesn’t happen. But I wanted to see the side effects, if any, while I was home, not at work.

Anyway, now, the connection between depression and weight. I have noticed for a long time, that a lot of overweight people are also unhappy. I think a lot of us overeat as a form of trying to self-medicate the depression. Because certain foods do make us feel better for a while.

By the way, a great book (fiction) dealing with addiction and trying to self-medicate your problems away with drugs (I realized I do this with food as I was reading it) is Rachel’s Holiday, by Marian Keyes. I love all the books by Marian Keyes. They are great “chick lit”. But this one is more. (Sorry, I read a lot, so I am going to throw in a lot of book recommendations, just because I like to.)

Well, I could say a lot more about this whole subject of depression and weight, but it will have to wait till another time - I’m pretty tired right now. I’ll do another post on it soon.

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Tags: 5-HTP, Artificial Sweeteners, Depression, Serontonin

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